From the files of “yes, sexism is alive and well,” come two stories from different sides of the globe.
In Iowa, an all-male state Supreme Court has upheld a decision that a dentist firing his nurse for being “irresistibly attractive” is legal. Dr. James Knight fired his dental nurse Melissa Nelson because he was worried he may cheat on his wife if he continued to be exposed to her fashion choices.
In Italy, a Catholic priest has said that women bring sexual violence upon themselves by dressing in provocative clothing. Piero Corsi, a priest in the small town of San Terenzio, wants women to consider whether their clothing brings on violence and sexual abuse.
Isn’t it great to be a modern woman, living in a first-world country, with so many freedoms our foremothers fought for us to have?
Oh, except for one thing: Can someone please tell me what I should be wearing?
See, I was going to leave the house wearing my usual outfit today: jeans, sneakers, t-shirt. My hair in a ponytail. (Yes, I’m the mom of an infant.)
But then I paused. What if I pass by a man in the street today who is turned on by how my breasts look in this cheap green t-shirt?
If I wear something a little more dressy when I go out with a girlfriend for dinner, do I need to be worried about causing possible infidelity of the man at the table next to me?
What if a man stops me on the street to tell me, as Dr. Knight told Melissa Nelson, that if I see his pants bulging, I would know my clothing is too revealing?
Guys, I’m really worried about this! I hadn’t realized that I needed to be so considerate of men’s feelings every time I left the house.
I consult every woman’s style guide, the magazine shelf at my local bookstore. But all I find is advice telling me that short skirts are in, that I should have my hair done this way or that, or that I should choose from a page full of nearly identical high heeled shoes for my next special occasion.
This is so confusing. Everywhere I look, I’m being told to dress a certain way, to spend hours preening and primping, and to try to look attractive everywhere I go.
But now that these new stories have come to light, I find myself in a quandary. I used to feel so free about what I wore, as long as I wasn’t indecently exposing myself then I figured I could wear anything I liked. Surely this is what feminists have been fighting for?
So what do I do now? Should I continue to wear my regular clothes, disregarding the feelings and emotions of men I encounter along the way? Or should I cover up head-to-toe, regardless of weather or occasion, secure and relieved in the knowledge that I won’t be jeopardizing any marriages?
Most importantly, could someone please just tell me: Does my bum look irresistibly attractive in this?
Tessa Needham finished her PhD in Performing Arts at the University of Western Sydney (Australia) in 2008. Her thesis explored the potential of performance to provoke change, and part of her research was Bodily, a solo theatrical performance about body image. She loves technology and the creative arts, and is passionate about the different cultural forces affecting the body image of girls and women. She teaches computers and does freelance creative work: www.tessaneedham.com.
This is sad in this day and time Women still must feel pressured to wear her clothes according to what someone else thinks.
I totally agree!!
It’s worth mentioning in the dental assistant case that the dentist consulted his pastor/priest on the issue, and the clergyman told him firing the woman was the right thing to do.
Yes, thanks for adding that! Seems that clergymen have a lot to say about this topic, doesn’t it…?
I think this is not right to say this. women have its own freedom they can live and wear any thing which is comfortable for them. Women Clothing Online –
Yeah, its very easy to dismiss the thought, because it is part of an obviously ridiculous and stupid story. But putting the idiotic priest and dentist aside – when you see a 16 year old girl in a skirt that’s more like a belt, in a tiny top with her belly hanging out, drinking like a horse and imitating blowjob on a pink dildo in a club – and trust me, it’s not an uncommon sight, just pop into ruby blue on leicester square,… – what do you think? Do you think that this is a sophisticated, respectful, well put-together woman who is definitely not a sexual toy? Don’t think so. You think that she is a cheap, shallow being who is probably so insecure, that you pay her one compliment and you’re in her knickers. And you know what, sadly, it’s probably true. So t-shirt and stupid dentist example aside – there IS rationale to the basic thought. Like it or not.