E! stoops to a new low with "Bridalplasty," premiering November 28.

E! stoops to a new low with "Bridalplasty," premiering November 28.

In the words of a dear friend, “What. The. F%$#!?”

Seriously, how else could anyone react to the upcoming train wreck/sign of the apocalypse that is Bridalplasty?

Just as I was about to reluctantly praise the executives at E! for handling the subject matter of What’s Eating You? with some tact, they began running promos for what is potentially the worst piece of reality trash to hit the airwaves since The Swan.

According to the official website, Bridalplasty viewers will have the pleasure of watching “brides-to-be compete in challenges to earn plastic-surgery procedures in a quest to win their ultimate dream wedding.”

I’m not even sure where to begin – it’s just that bad.

Well first of all, thank goodness E! has defined the single, ultimate female goal that is so crucial to womanhood, it necessitates fierce competition and cosmetic butchery: becoming a bride!

Second of all, what a relief to know that even if you’re woefully average, you can still make that one special man proud to call you his wife, just by undergoing an array of invasive procedures, most of which are performed under risky general anesthesia. Yay!

If you just can’t wait until November 28 to see how the world is slowly imploding, watch the preview of Bridalplasty below:

— Michelle Konstantinovsky is a student at UC Berkeley’s Graduate School of Journalism and an avid admirer of shiny objects and preteen entertainment. It would be nice if you visited her website: www.michellekmedia.com. Also, she may learn to use Twitter more effectively if you follow her @michelley415.