Megan Fox and Dominic Monaghan get violent in Eminem's "Love the Way You Lie" video
How would you feel watching a domestic abuse victim admit her desire for more pain? What if the cycle of violence were enacted by two celebrities, alternating between scenes of fierce aggression and passionate love?
What if all these images were set to a number-one, radio-friendly rap hit? Would you call it glamorization of a serious issue or a creative public service message?
Never one to shy away from controversy, Eminem recently released the new video for his single featuring Rihanna, “Love the Way You Lie.” Starring Megan Fox and Dominic Monaghan in a (literally) fiery relationship, the video is causing a big debate among music fans and domestic abuse prevention experts.
I have to admit, I’m torn on the matter. My first instinct is to scoff at any form of media that attempts to employ Megan Fox in a meaningful way (she, of the eloquent quotes, like: “I resent having to prove that I’m not a retard — but I do.”).
It also makes me absolutely uneasy to watch Rihanna, who repeatedly spoke out about her abusive relationship with Chris Brown, coo to the camera,
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
But that’s alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
But that’s alright because I love the way you lie.
And though I can’t deny being a fan of Eminem’s lyrical skills and serious talent, it’s no secret that he’s had his own violent past with ex-wife Kim. The song, allegedly about the couple’s roller-coaster relationship, even includes the disturbing lines, “If she ever tries to f—ing leave again/I’mma tie her to the bed and set the house on fire.”
The thought of MTV’s target audience interpreting the frightening lyrics and engaging images as sexy or glamorous is completely revolting. But to play devil’s advocate, there are some positive points to the video as well.
Though it’s easy to pick on Megan, she performed quite an admirable act by donating her fee for the video to Sojourn, a facility that helps battered women and their children.
And some experts believe that depicting the chilling realities of domestic abuse can help spread awareness. Stephanie Nilva, executive director of sexual assault and trauma resource center Day One, told MTV News, “The most important thing the video is doing is raising the topic of dating violence among young people.”
My own personal jury is still out, but feel free to form your own opinion on the video below:
I’m up for a pretty prestigious honor at my university, where I will be graduating in a few short weeks (gulp!). When I told a friend this news, he was pleased and happy for me. Then, curious, he started asking how I managed to do so well at college. So I answered a few questions, how I work hard and do the best I can–but then he cut me off.“Oh I know how,” he said. “You’ve never had a serious boyfriend in college.”
Tina Fey as Liz Lemon on 30 Rock
Excuse me? Was he actually suggesting that women can never succeed while we’re seriously dating someone? Because, you know, having jobs and internships and hanging out with friends and casually dating — that’s nothing compared to what it would take for a woman to maintain the attention of a boyfriend? Why is it that our society thinks women can’t have it all?
And that’s how I landed on people like Tina Fey.
Now, I love Tina Fey. I love her shows, I love her movies, I love her intelligence, and I especially love her Sarah Palin impersonations. She is a woman who’s broken down doors in the guys-only club of comedy. But I hate the women she plays. The women she consistently plays in her movies and shows are extremely successful, intelligent women who have unbelievably dull, pathetic social lives. Think of her characters in 30 Rock, Baby Mama, and Mean Girls–they are all are professional women who are clueless when it comes to their personal lives.
This has become a media trend over the decades–portraying women as either one or the other. Think Ally McBeal (successful lawyer, emotional instability), and Cristina Yang from Grey’s Anatomy (most intelligent intern in the hospital, yet cold and hostile to others). These kinds of characters are interesting and funny, and they certainly contribute to the laugh track. But I’ve had enough of it.
It’s great we’re seeing women characters as successful lawyers, doctors, and writers. But why must shows and movies always fall back on the same old portrayal–”she’s successful, but she can’t keep a boyfriend!” or “she’s smart, but she sure is crazy”?
What message is this sending? You can be successful either on the weekdays or the weekends, but not both?
Phylicia Rashad as Clair Huxtable on The Cosby Show
There are few examples of women in the media who do have it all–success and social lives. Phylicia Rashad’s Clair Huxtable on The Cosby Show was a loving, strict, successful, happy mother of five. I am also lucky enough to have grown up surrounded by extremely talented women who led happy lives, including my own mother. (I actually took an online quiz once to find out which TV family is most like mine, and it turns out we are the Huxtables). Why can’t we see more women who do have it all?
I have led the last four years of college socially and academically. Maybe I’ve never had a long-term relationship while in college, save for the couple month-long ones, but I have made some incredible long-term friends. But who’s counting anyway? And who’s to say any relationship of any kind would deter me from my goals?
-Kate
Kate Elston is a senior majoring in Media Studies at the University of San Francisco. Upon graduation, she plans to work as a journalist or filmmaker. Kate wants to dedicate her career to media literacy and use the media to promote positive change.
