Posts filed under 'everyday experiences'
One of the most vivid memories I have from high school was when I was shopping for prom dresses with a good friend. What started as a bonding experience quickly turned into something much more isolating.
Selena Gomez and Tori Spelling
We had completely different bodies. She was tall, thin, and had no hips, and I was shorter with decent-sized thighs. In high school we would bring in a bunch of dresses and trade off trying them all on. Most dress styles were tailored for the body type my friend inhabited, and because of this, she looked “better” in the dresses than I did. Needless to say, my attitude level dropped a few points below annoyed, and I walked out of the mall that day with a new-found dislike for my body, and for my friend.
Why do we hold one body type above all others? Why do we let the fact that people come in different shapes come in between us? That bitter day, years ago, was in part due to women’s magazines. Not only do they allow these body comparisons, women’s magazines encourage readers to pick apart how different women look in the same dress.
This notion has entire sections in magazines devoted to it. The section has gone by many names, but on the Us Weekly web site, it is called “Who Wore It Best?” This section features photos of two or three celebrities wearing the same thing. Sometimes it’s a jacket or a blouse, but most of the time it’s a dress. In the online version, visitors are encouraged to click on the celebrity they think looks the best.
Jessica Simpson, Blake Lively, and Lily Collins
Letting ourselves look at other women this way can seep into our everyday lives. We may start to compare ourselves to others around us, whether it’s the women on TV or a friend in the changing room next to us. This outlook can foster a kind of body competition between women, distracting us from more pertinent issues, such as positive relationships with the people around you or doing well in school or at work.
There is always something that we can find to be envious of — the way that woman can pull off that spunky haircut, or that other woman’s long eyelashes, or maybe the way she can fill out her blouse. What would happen if we stopped being envious of these things and started admiring them? What if we knew that when we said “you look great” that it wouldn’t take anything away from our own beauty?
My challenge to you is to do just that; notice when you may feel jealous or envious and turn it into a compliment for that woman. It is also just as important to recognize the uniqueness and beauty in yourself. Our relationships with other women and our own bodies are too important to fall apart over dress sizes.
If you want to let Us Weekly know how you feel about the “Who Wore It Best” section, you can contact them through their web site.
-Ashley
June 30th, 2009
Take a look at this segment that aired on Good Morning America on June 15th. The piece is called “Young, Fat, and Fabulous,” and it seems to advocate for women to have a healthy self-image at any size, but the message may not be so clear…
Did you notice the uneven general tone of this segment? Is it positive or negative?
This segment seems to flip-flop between supporting women who are happy and healthy at any size and then in a negative tone also highlights all the dangers the show’s producers believe are associated with obesity. Although these women have a clear bill of health from their doctors, at the end of the segment, Diane Sawyer tries to emphasize that they will have health complications later on… but if you listen carefully, the response is that these health risks increase due to age, not due to weight.
The piece talks about yo-yo dieting while at the same time sending a yo-yo message.
The first half of this segment is dedicated to telling viewers that being fat is OK and that these particular women are happier and healthier than they’ve ever been. Then the last half sends the opposite message — that being overweight leads to deadly health problems. Yet then they go on to say that yo-yo dieting is bad because it can also lead to terrible health complications.
I think this is reflective of our society’s overall indecisiveness about weight and health, and represents the tension that exists between wanting to be thin and wanting to be healthy and happy and love ourselves as we are.
Is it OK to be fat and fabulous? Can you be overweight and be healthy?
According to the Association for Size Diversity and Health (ASDAH), health is measured by many factors, including the right to be peaceful in one’s body. ASDAH has also done research that shows that the amount of fat on a body is a weak indicator of life expectancy and overall health.
Despite its mixed message, once you sort through the confusion, this piece does have some healthy points to take home:
Health comes in different sizes.
Acceptance of one’s body type can ultimately prove beneficial, especially when that acceptance is paired with a healthy lifestyle.
As Gabrielle mentions, the most important thing is to stay active, eat a balanced diet, and accept your weight where it stabilizes.
I think it’s fabulous that Marianne loves what she sees when she looks in the mirror. How many women of any weight and body type can actually say they love how they look? I hope that one day every woman will love herself as she is. No woman’s self worth should be determined by the scale or the size of her pants.
So I commend Marianne for telling the world that:
The good in accepting being large far outweighs the bad.
and
The only thing I’ve let go is the self-hatred that I felt.
Shouldn’t we all try to feel that way?
-Jaimie
[By the way, everyone, the fat activist movement is not a new grassroots movement. Fat activism has been alive and well for at least 15 years. Check out this site, Fat!So? for more. -Jennifer]
June 19th, 2009
While I was watching reruns of a family-friendly sitcom the other afternoon, a commercial came on advertising longer and fuller eyelashes. Usually commercials with promises of pumping up eyelash volume are reserved for mascara. This commercial, however, was for the prescription medicine, Latisse. The commercial informs the viewer that one must consult a doctor before using the beauty product.
Though the common side effects are relatively harmless (itchy eyes and redness), the fact remains that the Latisse advertisers are selling doctor-prescribed medicine to improve one’s appearance. Through the bumping music, the before-and-after shots, and the spokesmodel Brooke Shields, the commercial lures viewers into thinking life would be better with long eyelashes. With the long eyelashes Latisse would give them, they too could have fun at parties and flirt with men as Brooke Shields would.
It really took me aback that a medical body “enhancement” procedure is being advertised on daytime television. Not only was this medical cure to a non-existent problem being sold to viewers, it was being sold during a family oriented show! With the beginning of summer comes a sharp increase in the number of children watching television during the day. The chances of tweenagers watching this commercial are high.
No woman needs to be told her lashes are “inadequate or not enough” but especially young girls should not be subjected to the notion that their bodies need fixing.
If you want to make your voice heard about these advertising techniques, you can contact the makers of Latisse through the Allergan web site.
-Ashley
June 17th, 2009
For the past few weeks, I’ve seen this link for the 15 Sexist Vintage Ads floating around cyberspace, shared among Facebook friends and highlighted on humor and culture blogs. It takes you to a web site that showcases 15 “sexist” ads from the early and mid-twentieth century. With overtly sexist tag lines like “The harder a wife works the cuter she looks,” “Blow in her face and she’ll follow you anywhere,” and “Men are better than women,” these ads look different from what we’re used to seeing today.
Or do they?
Take a closer look.
In this first group, notice the vintage ad’s placement of the women’s lips and the lipstick. Then notice the similarities to the modern ad. Both ads portray the sexualization of women.
In this next group, notice how both ads portray women as less than human.
In this last group, notice what both ads insinuate — that women are dumb, or should strive to be so.
In both worlds, decades apart, women are portrayed the same: as unintelligent, as submissive, as sexual fiends, and as objects.
Sure, the vintage ads are a little different. Advertisements today don’t have blatant, wordy warnings, stating that if women don’t smell good or feel soft, they risk having their husbands literally not come home that night. But look around. Look at fashion magazines, billboards and TV commercials. The overall message of nearly every single ad is that we women are imperfect and need to strive to keep a man’s attention.
Advertisements — those from 1949 and 2009 — never let us forget that a woman is judged only on the basis of her appeal to men.
And even though we don’t see sexism spelled out, as in the vintage ad that reads, “Men ask ‘is she pretty?’ not ‘is she clever?’ ” we see that sexism when ads continually warn us to slim down, whiten teeth, curl hair, smell better, shave, primp, yet never to — get this — be strong, brave, intelligent, and powerful. In the twenty-first century, women are absolutely still being told to be pretty. Forget clever.
Also, notice the disconnect in the ad on the left: How is spanking a woman at all related to selling coffee?, you might be asking. But I would ask the same thing today of the ad on the right: How is a naked, faceless woman at all related to electronics?!
Furthermore, these vintage ads are nowhere near as sexually explicit as ones today. These ads don’t feature extreme closeups of women’s breasts, butts, and unrealistic and unattainable body images, all to sell a product and make girls feel ashamed. Ads back then may have been sexist, but ads now are sexist and sexually explicit.
So before you pass the 15 Sexist Vintage Ads link onto your friends, laughing at how much things have changed, think again. Have they?
Let us know what you think, About-Face blog readers. Go through the vintage ad web site and About-Face’s Gallery of Offenders to find similarities and differences yourself. Leave your findings and thoughts in the comments.
-Kate
June 12th, 2009
Michelle Obama, showing off those famous guns.
From the moment the Obama family moved into the White House, our newest President and his wife became instant American icons. A beautiful and intelligent African-American couple, the Obamas exist under a social microscope with the media reporting on virtually every aspect of their lives.
In the midst of all the Obamamania, one of the most interesting news trends is the increasing interest in Michelle Obama, often subjecting her to a level of attention beyond the normal scrutiny reserved for a first lady.
Michelle Obama has essentially become public domain, with every aspect of her body up for discussion, from her clothing choices to her physical body itself.
The interest in Michelle’s clothing is like most relationships we have with public figures. There is a fun and escapist quality in watching her wardrobe choices. Mrs. Obama has a huge fashion following, often referred to as “the new Jackie O”, she inspires blogs that track her every outfit, and coffee table books celebrating her style. She makes headlines whether she’s wearing designer Narcisco Rodriguez or J. Crew, and even her penchant for sleeveless frocks inspires nationwide controversy.
Like the obsession with her wardrobe, the attention given to Michelle Obama’s body feels inspired by the public’s voyeurism (the press and public often critique the bodies of female celebrities), as well as a desire to be like Mrs. Obama. From Fitness Magazine to Glamour, magazines everywhere are promoting articles on “How to Get Michelle Obama’s Arms!” Very interesting. But what does this say about us?
Is it strange that the press is focusing so much on Mrs. Obama’s clothing and body, and rarely mentioning her other life accomplishments? Or are women simply inspired by an extraordinary first lady who always looks fantastic?
The desire to dress and look like Michelle Obama is understandable, she is a beautiful woman who promotes a healthy body image, which the public is clearly responding favorably to. But here are 4 facts about Mrs. Obama that get a little less press coverage:
- Michelle was born and grew up on the South Side of Chicago and graduated from Princeton University and Harvard Law School.
- Michelle met Barack Obama when they were working at the same law firm, and she was assigned to mentor him.
- She promised Barack that she would support his decision to run for President if he quit smoking.
- She is a strong and down-to-earth mother who values her children remaining as normal as possible, keeping them involved in play dates, school, and sports activities.
Mrs. Obama’s body is something to be desired, but I would like to know that as many women are inspired to attend Ivy League schools, go to law school, support their husbands, and become strong mothers because of her example, too. Obviously, Michelle is truly a positive female role model, and the media should treat her as such…with or without those toned arms.
-Nikki
June 1st, 2009
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